Dear Jack,
I'm not your personal jester. I know it looks like I'm not doing much, sitting here very still with just my fingers moving. But I am actually typing. And I am typing words that turn into pay. And pay turns into things like food. And heat. Things that you enjoy.
So, in the future, I would kindly ask you that you not treat me as your personal plaything. This means:
- No whining when you're bored.
- Please stop jumping on me.
- Don't make sudden, loud noises. I am often in a state of deep concentration, and they tend to scare me.
- Quit looking at me expectantly everytime I stand up. It is not game time.
And, since he doesn't understand me, would you please kindly tell the cat to stop laying in front of the monitor? I mean, I know it's warm and all, but come on. It's really hard to write with his 20 pound mass sitting right in front of my screen.
